A lot of people have been asking about what is wrong with me. I realized that I have not come out and said that I suffer from extreme depression. I usually wouldn't post this on a blog or anywhere where i will have to actually face what is happening to me, but I felt it important to spread the message.
I am usually a very happy, loud, and boisterous person. Since my last baby I have suffered from depression. I LOVE him and I LOVE to have him around. It is nothing like that at all. He continually saves my life. It is good knowing that someone needs me and is completely dependent on me. He is a joy and all of the kids are my world.
I feel sometimes like I don't do enough. Like I will never be enough and that is when things get very dark for me. I sometimes feel like they would be better off without me. I however, realize that this is an irrational thought. I can usually talk myself into calming down and seeing the bigger picture. I am seeing a doctor for this problem and I am being medicated. I think i have finally found the right fit for me and barring any crazy mishaps I should be ok.
I really just want people to be aware of people around them and how they are feeling. When I am overwhelmed it is probably not the best time to confront me with things from the past. I can usually handle most things but lately I am just not myself. I promise I will be back....I just can't tell you when :)
Summer
7 years ago
6 comments:
It was good visiting with you today Jenny. You are so fun to talk with. I had to resist the urge to kidnap little Chasey. You are wonderful and will make it through this rough patch.
No matter what I have ALWAYS thought you are amazing! You will get through this because you are you. Big hugs! If you ever need anything call me!! It's been too long and we should hang out or do lunch or just sit! :-)
So sorry girl. I relate. Depression is a terrible thing and I don't think moms should ever have to live it!! You ARE amazing. And you're not alone.
I'm sorry you're going through this. It's not something you created or can control (without medicine), so keep talking and keep with the meds that you said are helping you. I'm glad you have found something that seems to work. Good luck to you!
Honesty is so refreshing and so are you, Jenny. It takes a lot of courage to not only realize you have a challenge but then to do something about it. I like you!
I totally agree with the whole thing about being aware of people around you!! We don't know what kind of crap they're going through!!
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